Chinese idioms about showing due consideration for other people
Our proverbs come with full information. The modern Chinese characters are given first with links that give information on the character. As proverbs are so old you will often see them written using the traditional form of characters; so if some of the characters have been simplified the traditional form is shown in brackets and gray text. The characters are followed by the proverb (normally a 成语 chéng yǔ) in pinyin. Next, there is a crude character by character transliteration into English, followed by a more accurate English translation. If this is a Chinese proverb alluding to history the meaning may still not be clear in English, so the general meaning follows. Finally some proverbs have fairly direct English equivalents, if so the English proverb is shown.
For background on the types and history of proverbs please see our guide.
Working together requires consideration for other people, and this thought features in many Chinese proverbs. Things get along much better if everyone works in harmony.
不告而别 [不告而別]
No words spoken when leave
Leave without saying goodbye.
打人不打脸 [打人不打臉]
Better to hit a person than their reputation. Losing 'face' is a major consideration for Chinese people
Be diplomatic and tactful when being critical.
Roughly equivalent to: To err is human; to forgive divine.
得鱼忘筌 [得魚忘筌]
After catching a fish forget the trap
Ungrateful behavior, ignoring help given to make things possible.
Roughly equivalent to: Don't bite the hand that feeds you.
恩将仇报 [恩將仇報]
Repay kindness with hostility
Reject kindness.
Roughly equivalent to: Biting the hand that feeds it.
风雨同舟 [風雨同舟]
In the same boat in a storm
Facing troubles together.
Roughly equivalent to: A trouble shared is a trouble halved.
隔岸观火 [隔岸觀火]
Watch the fire burn from the other side of the river
Refusing to help others when it is needed.
横行霸道 [橫行霸道]
Walking sidewise to block the way
Being deliberately obstructive.
家丑不可外扬 [家丑不可外揚]
Family shame should not be spread
Keep family problems within the family.
蜡烛照亮别人,却毁灭了自己 [蠟燭照亮別人㕁毀滅了自己]
A candle illuminates others at the cost of burning itself up
Helping others at the cost of not looking after yourself.
Roughly equivalent to: Love thy neighbor as thyself.
萝卜白菜,各有所爱 [蘿卜白菜各有所愛]
Some prefer radish while others like cabbage
Everyone has their own preferences.
Roughly equivalent to: Each to his own.
抛砖引玉 [拋塼引玉]
Cast out a brick to invite jade
Stimulate others to contribute to conversation by making a silly or superficial remark that sparks off debate.
强扭的瓜不甜 [強扭的瓜不甜]
A melon taken off its vine is not sweet
Coercion never ends up satisfactorily. Leave things to develop naturally.
人要脸,树要皮 [人要臉樹要皮]
Keeping a good reputation is as essential as bark is to a tree
Reputation ('face') must be maintained at all costs.
入乡随俗 [入鄉隨俗]
When entering a village, follow its customs
Take account of local people and opinions.
Roughly equivalent to: When in Rome do as the Romans do.
树倒猢狲散 [樹倒猢猻散]
When the tree falls, the monkeys scatter
When a leader loses power, his followers are disorganized and also lose power. Often said to warn someone that they hold their position only so long as their patron is in power.
兔子不吃窝边草 [兔子不吃窩邊草]
Rabbits do not eat the grass around their burrows
Thieves do not steal from neighbors.
袖手旁观 [袖手旁觀]
To look on with folded arms
To look on without offering any help or showing concern.
指桑骂槐 [指桑罵槐]
Pointing to the mulberry tree when the locust tree is to blame
Deliberately deflecting criticism to someone or something else - often to protect friends or family.
千里送鹅毛 [千里送鵝毛]
A swan feather from a thousand miles away
Showing appreciation on receiving a gift that shows the sender has taken time and trouble to choose it. Traveling a very long way to deliver what seems to be a trifle. The tale is from the Tang dynasty when Mian Bogai sent a gift of a special swan to the Emperor. However one feather was all that was left from the swan when he eventually arrived. So this is a rejoinder when someone receives a gift that is seemingly of low value.
Roughly equivalent to: Don't look a gift horse in the mouth.
因势利导 [因勢利導]
Helping things along
To encourage something along to its natural fulfillment.
举案齐眉 [舉案齊眉]
Lifting the tray up to the eyebrows
Showing respect and affection for someone. It is a traditional show of respect to lift a tray high when presenting food to a respected guest. Lasting love and consideration.
乐不思蜀 [樂不思蜀]
So happy that the kingdom of Shu is forgotten
Lost in present pleasures so as to forget home and duties. Said of Liu Chan ruler of the Shu kingdom (Sichuan province) who when defeated and in exile heard songs of his old kingdom but did not become melancholy like his other guests. So it refers to someone living in the present and not caring about the past. Lost in the moment.
河东狮吼 [河東獅吼]
The lioness from Hedong roars
A husband under the control of a domineering wife. The story is of Chen Zao of the Song dynasty who often had guests around in the evening. If his wife got to hear that there were other women with him she would knock on the wall and roar. A hen-pecked man.
Roughly equivalent to: She who must be obeyed.
舐犊之爱 [舐犢之愛]
The love of a cow licking her calf
An example of parental love and devotion. A biased assessment due to family ties - caring for one's own relatives.
Roughly equivalent to: The fruit does not fall far from the tree.
结草衔环 [結草銜環]
Tying grass and delivering rings
Generously repaying a debt of gratitude. The story is of Yang Bao who nursed a sick bird back to health. After he had released the siskin into the wild he dreamed of the bird carrying grass tied in rings in its beak which transformed into a boy with precious jade rings . The boy gave Yang Bao enduring good fortune in gratitude.
完璧归赵 [完璧歸趙]
Returning the jade bi to Zhao
A jade bi is a large round piece with a hole in the middle. The story is of an ancient Imperial 'crown jewel' the 'He shi bi' that was stolen by the king of Qin. The ruler of the state of Zhao then managed to get it back. It has come to mean returning something (in good condition) to its rightful owner.
城门失火,殃及池鱼 [城門失火殃及池魚]
Burning a city gate kills the fish in the moat
A drastic action may unintentionally affect other people. Show consideration for all.
过河拆桥 [過河拆橋]
Dismantling the bridge after crossing it
Not showing due consideration for others.
害群之马 [害群之馬]
The horse that causes trouble to the herd
The bad person of the family or group.
Roughly equivalent to: Bad apple; Black sheep.
家家户户 [家家戶戶]
Every family
The whole community.
节哀顺变 [節哀順變]
Hold back on grief and accept the mishap
Often said as a token of condolence on a death.
麻雀虽小,五脏俱全 [麻雀雖小五臟俱全]
Small as it is, the sparrow has all the vital organs
A person is a person regardless of size. Complete in every detail.
饮水思源 [㱃水思源]
When drinking water remember the origin
Do not forget the source of your good fortune (particularly your parents)
Roughly equivalent to: Count your blessings.
反覆推敲
Carefully considering the words push and knock
Spending considerable time to get the words just right. Showing excessive concern on minor details. Based on the story of an Tang dynasty official who spent ages deciding whether 'knock' or 'push' was the appropriate word in a poem.
Roughly equivalent to: Slow but sure.
一夜十往 [一夜十徃]
Ten visits in one night
Showing great care and concern. The story comes from the Han dynasty when an official checked the state of a sick relative ten times during the night.
宋襄之仁
Kindness like Song Duke Xianggong
Showing mercy and consideration to opponents. The story is from the Spring and Autumn period when Duke Xianggong of the kingdom of Song confronted an army from the kingdom of Chu. His officers pleaded with the duke to attack while they were still crossing the river, the duke refused considering this an unfair tactic.
宾至如归 [賓至如歸]
Guests feel at home
Warmly welcoming guests to your home. Guests treated as part of the family.
Roughly equivalent to: Be my guest.
约法三章 [約法三章]
Setting out the three articles of law
Imposing simple and clear laws. At the end of the bitter Civil War that brought the Qin dynasty to an end in 206BCE, the leader Liu Bang chose to dispose of all the laws of the Qin, replacing them with three simple laws: do not kill; do not harm and do not steal. Liu Bang went on to found the Han dynasty that ruled for 400 years.
安居乐业 [安居樂業]
Live and work in peace and contentment
Wishing you well in a new home.
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出生入死
To risk one's life
Offer unquestioning support.
Roughly equivalent to: Through thick and thin.
顾左右而言他 [顧左右而言他]
Looking both ways and changing the subject
Avoiding talking about something; taking a long digression.
嫁祸于人 [嫁旤于人]
A person in misfortune blames someone else
Spread blame onto others.
守口如瓶
To keep mouth shut, like a bottle
To avoid giving the game away; to not breathe a word.
Roughly equivalent to: See no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil.
一视同仁 [一眎同仁]
Everybody treat same kindness
Treat all people the same.
程门立雪 [程門立雪]
Standing at Cheng's door in the snow
Showing great respect for someone - usually a teacher or scholar. The story is that a great scholar accidentally left two students waiting for him for hours out in the snow.
老当益壮 [老當益壯]
Old but still vigorous
Remaining vigorous, skillful and healthy in old age.
解衣推食
Sharing garments and food
Sharing clothes and food with someone in need. To treat with great kindness and consideration.
后顾之忧
Looking after troubles behind you
Worried about events back at home. Said of someone concerned about goings on at home rather than things immediately to hand.
糟糠之妻
A wife of chaff-eating days
A loyal wife. Chaff is only eaten when no other food is available and so it means someone who is prepared to share in depredations - sharing the bad times as well as the good.
Roughly equivalent to: Through thick and thin.